blogging depression and some other blogs

March 7th, 2013

blogging depression and some other blogs

Published in updated news - recent posts, upon further review

how can i call myself a blogger if my blogging randomly stops for a few weeks at a time? truth be told it’s usually due to a bit of depression mixed in with a general malaise towards society. yup, that pretty much sums up the usual reason why i stop blogging. recently i’ve tried taking high doses of vitamin b in efforts to feel a bit more “up” but that hasnt really helped. not too much gets me going these days – it’s been free based down to great structured tournaments and cute women. that’s it. is that bad? i guess it could be worse and only be women. besides playing in tournaments that i can’t really afford to play in nothing is really stimulating me on all levels like it should. maybe i need to move. i wouldnt mind that but i’ve been pretty much everywhere in the us to know that this part of the country is the best fit for me. hmmmm i wouldnt mind splitting time between vegas and here. at least in vegas u can be lonely while surrounded by tons of other people usually having a great time. maybe their good time would rub off on me.

speaking of stimulation and rubbing off on me – i went to a coffee shop tonight in order to get into writing mode. instead i got into “reading someone else’s blog” mode. i discovered this blog completely by random in a weird moment of facebook diving. it’s nice getting motivated after reading someone’s blog. this blog was about this girl’s life in hollywood…that’s what it was about. simple, open and honest – like a gordon ramsay restaurant makeover. her name is luci i can relate to her on a few levels particularly her tenacity, gemini references (im a gemini and also a twin giving me the zodiac trump card though) and sheer blog density/robustness. this chick needs to promote her blog because she doesnt know how good it is. it seems like she is destined for big things. i drank 2 double iced espressos and still didnt finish it. anyway, job well done – it motivated me to get back to what i have been flaking on. it also reminded me of when i blogged on blogger which i now see has turned into blogspot. i’m gonna start mentioning other people’s blogs that i like. i came across a girl’s fashion blog last month that i did some ad work with and her blog was quite impressive as far as honest fashion blogs go. her name is madeline and she makes good videos. good blogs are the genuine ones and the ones that prove the test of time. it’s tough getting people to read ur blog….i used to have lots of blog readers but that stuff correlates to ur “fame”. for now it’s just dad and a few randoms. hi dad sorry i havent called u back. i’m sure after i win a major tournament this blog will get some serious traffic. until then though….

anyway, i watched all the bust out videos that i made and i must say, i find them horrifically beautiful in their raw and unrehearsedness (that word sense to me although i dont think it’s a word). the vids are really fuckin stupid on one level but they’re as honest as can be and that “real time processing” is good. doing it to video is however, either genius or moronic. probably the later but who knows, i think i’m the only poker player doing something like that. ironically, i never make videos when i win. all the cashes — at the bike during the circuit event, at the lapc, and even home games – courtenay was there for a bunch and we should have just made a video because it was a fucking celebration bitches. i’m gonna have to start doing this because that stuff is priceless and definitely a lot more fun to relive than me trying to untangle my brain after losing. ok, new marching orders…bring ipad to every tournament and make sure to record the “good times”. i guess this sort of makes sense though… when i was in my first band signed to island i had 2 press kits – one that was full of great reviews and one that only had bad/negative reviews. the neg one was more interesting to me than hearing all the good shit i already knew. hmmm go figure – old patterns. plus….i dont believe u get better hearing people tell u all the good stuff u already know. it’s sifting thru the bad stuff where u find areas to improve upon.

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